I have to be honest, I haven't been reading it with my full undivided attrition when reading it. I get very easily distracted by TV, facebook, puzzles, and yes even food! I have a history with food. When my doctor told me I needed to lose weight and go on a diet, I cried. I told him I love food, I love sweets!! I think sweets are my go-to, when I am feeling lonely and depressed. When I felt like nobody wanted to hang out with me, sweets were my best friend!! They were always there and available.
Lysa writes, "I relied on food more than I relied on God. " I can totally relate, I became a firm believer in Jesus around 2003. During that time Jesus showed me that my cerebral pasly was a gift from Him. I think for so many of my younger years I struggled with my CP, that I blanketed my struggle with food. I didn't see food as a big deal. I also believed that I didn't think a lot of about calories and food intake, because I was burning so many calories in the pool. In high school and my younger 20s I didn't need to think about food and exercise, because I was in the pool almost every day.
As I read Made to Crave," chapter 9 caught my undivided attention. Just the title alone, caught my eye and made me turn off the TV, and go outside to read!! Chapter 9: But Exercise Makes Me Want to Cry." Yes! Yes! Yes!! I had to laugh at this title, this is how I feel about physical therapy!! Growing up I had to do a lot of physical therapy, and still do. I didn't always like it, because it made me feel different. In middle school and in high school I had to do physical therapy instead of going to gym class. My PT would come to school once a week to do PT with me, of course as a teenager this made me feel different and I didn't always want to do it. I didn't really care about how I was walking, and I was in pretty good shape because of swim club. Physical Therapy made me want to cry!! Not because it was hard, (even though it was at times,) nor because it hurt, but because it made me feel different from my peers.
At the high school we did therapy in the carreer room, we would lock the door so people couldn't come in. Ward, one of my PT, wanted me to use a cane. He says it was because I was falling a lot. He probably was right, but again it made me feel different and "Made me want to cry!!" I didn't use it as much as I should of.
"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God." (1 Corthin 6:19)
As I am becoming older I am learning that I have to take care of my body. Lysa writes, "But the Lord's strong caution is to 'give careful thought to your ways' and to make time to 'build the house' so that He may be honored." I am learning that working out and doing PT is important to my health. I have to consider my ways and take time to build my muscles so they will stay stronger as I age. My PT told me that as I age I may have more joint and muscles issues then most people my age. I also need to consider using my walking sticks. My doctor and PT also told me that I should consider using my walking sticks more. They don't want me to have the risk of falling. I need to realize that my body is getting older and now there is a higher risk of falling. In the past 3 years, I have injured myself more then I have in the past 30 years. Lysa writes, "There are natural consequences for not taking care of our bodies." I want to prevent those falls and consequences as long as possible! Three weeks ago I fell down some steps and bruised my ribs. I'm still felling the consequences of that fall.
Again I have laugh, because chapter 10 of Made to Crave is, "It's Not Fair." My poor parents heard this so many times when it came to me complaining about my CP. My dad always use to say, "Brianne, life isn't fair!" Isn't that the truth! Lysa writes, "Saying 'it's not fair' has caused many girls to toss aside what she knows is right for the temporary thrill of whatever is that does seem fair." Even know I want to say "It is not fair that I have to using walking sticks at 34 years old, or that I have to deal with muscle and joint pain at 34," I know that if I use them now it will beneficial as I age. I am trying to use them more. It may not be fair in the moment, but I have realize how much farther I can go and how less tired I become when I put down my pride and use them. I also am learning that when I do use them, I walk so much straighter, which is the long run will prevent my body from breaking down faster! So I guess I need to "take caution to my ways, and build my house (muscles)." I should consider the advice my doctor and PT give me because this is the only body I will have. I need to continue exercises, do my PT, and take care of myself as long as I can. I'm not sure what my body may do or not do, but I want to take care of what God has givin me even if it means using walking sticks at 34!
I love sweets! That made me cry to Dr. Paulson! But he was so understanding! Now I just need to get back in my routine!



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